Injustice, oppression, and problems, so the life of the survivor Mona (pseudonym) for ten years was since she married her cousin. She had four children. She never tasted comfort, but what is the cause of the suffering she has been through for so long? And how was she helped to get rid of the effects of that hard life?
In the countryside of one of the Yemeni governorates, Mona was living a simple normal life. Because women in the countryside of the northern governorates do not enjoy their most basic rights - because of some tribal customs that dominate the culture of the people in the rural areas of that governorates-, Mona had an unassertive and weak personality and was hesitant, afraid and unsure of herself; she was even closed and conservative with limited way of thinking. Her education was limited to high school, and she was not good at the art of speech or even the way she chose what to wear, as described by the survivor.
Fate wanted her to marry her cousin, who returned from exile for the purpose of marriage. Mona married him and gave birth to four children. However, the difference of culture and way of thinking between Mona and her cousin made her life with him full of injustice, oppression, and problems due to his poor treatment and inferiority to her. He used to describe her from time to time as stupid and has limited thought, and that she was not worthy of him as a wife.
Even the husband's family had expected from the beginning that the marriage would not last long because of the difference in mentalities and education between them. The husband's mother was working hard to end the marriage.
For 10 years, Mona has endured the cruelty and injustice of her husband and his family, so that she does not lose him. She even decided to make changes in herself, beginning with her appearance and developed more and more in terms of clothing, speech and the strength of her personality after the encouragement of those around her.
The days and years passed as she tried hard to please her conceited husband until her eldest daughter was 18 years old. She thought she had succeeded in forming her happy family.
However, her joy did not last long, her belief was not true, and her efforts were in vain. When her husband, without warning and without much reason, surprised her with a divorce. She did not believe it until she received her divorce paper, in which he wrote that she was "divorced and without reasons". This had put her in a shock and caused her a psychological trauma. She denied what had happened to her and refused to return to her father's house. She claimed that she had not been divorced and that her husband had sent that to her by mistake, but her father forced her out of her husband's house and took her children with her to his house. After noticing that she continued to deny her divorce, they brought her to the FCDF to treat her for the trauma she had suffered.
Therapeutic procedures:
After the initial assessment of the case, she was subjected to the first session: Denial of Shock.
As a result of the severe shock she had, Mona continued to completely deny what had happened to her, and she was talking about her most beautiful days with him, his most beautiful personal qualities, and how happy and optimistic she was. The specialist felt that the survivor did not understand that she was divorced from her husband, so she gave her assessments and set another session to continue the assessments.
Session 2: Feelings of Anger
In the second session, the survivor came feeling "a volcano burning her body." she said, and she was pouring her anger on her husband, who divorced her for no reason, praying on him day and night. Here the specialist realized that the survivor was in the second stage of the shock. The specialist explained to the survivor that what she had been subjected to was "violence", and her divorce was arbitrary. She was then trained to control her anger, to relax her mind, and to try to work her psychological support methods until she calmed down.
After that, she was referred to a psychiatrist who prescribed psychiatric medications to help her accept what had happened and ease her tantrum, and was given a new appointment for a third session.
Session 3: Bargaining
During the third session, the survivor began to bargain that she would give up her rights and anything they asked for in exchange for her return to her husband. Yet she had one fact that she had been divorced and had to accept the truth and set new goals for life away from this arrogant husband.
The survivor broke down in tears and shouting, feeling injustice, oppression, and remorse for the years she had spent in order to make her life a success and to preserve her precious family.
The third session was concluded on the basis that she would stop thinking about the trauma of a period of time, use the rule of happiness (here and now), training on the method (stop ideas), and also on the method (time out), until it completely calms down and collects the fragments of herself.
Session 4: Acceptance
In order to start a new phase in her life with new goals, she was referred to the services provided by the Foundation to battered women, referred to the legal side until she regained her right, as well as her training in life skills and rehabilitation. She was involved in the group therapy- in group therapy, groups of battered women- to alleviate trauma, and to easily accept the new situation through reintegration and emotional engagement.
5th and 6th Session: Family Therapy
Family therapy sessions were conducted to help her children to accept the trauma by explaining the idea of divorce and that it is a solution to some sterile problems, and explain that this will not affect the love of the parents for them. They were helped assume and distribute roles and responsibilities in the house, and encourage each other, and that each of them is responsible for his or her brother or sister. They have also been listened to. Solutions have been worked out for their life problems, and fear and anxiety about the future have been alleviated by citing examples of families going through the same experience that has not been affected or disturbed. Besides, they had training in behavioral experimentation (i.e. what we feel may not be true). We sometimes feel afraid of certain things, but when we apply them or try them, we discover that we overreact. In addition to mental relaxation training, so that they can control their fears. They were also trained in the happiness base style (here and now).
Family Improvement
In the light of that program, the family's psychological condition has improved, after a three-month treatment, and the survivor expressed her thanks and gratitude for the efforts made, both at the hotline and in clinics to reunite the family and prevent it from collapsing and being lost. She thanked the specialist for her dedicated work, which restored hope and happiness, and thanked the management of the foundation, which is dedicated all its efforts in the service of the community, both in the countryside and the city, to contribute to solving problems and saving families from destruction and dispersion through the free hotline (136). Finally, the Foundation will have to follow up treatment via hotline when needed.